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I Used to Be Single, Too

2/12/2013

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One of the most memorable holidays of my college career was the Valentine's Day where I—a single guy—along with four single girls, sat down to watch the romantic film Chocolat, drink cayenne pepper-infused hot chocolate like they make in the movie (surprisingly delicious), and lament how pathetic all of us were for being single.

Think about that for a moment.

Though I'm happily married now (and if you don't believe me, follow this link for the start of the 4-part engagement story and 8-part wedding story), I recall very strongly what it was like to be single. Throughout the years, I've heard a lot of grumbling and moping every time Valentine's Day rolls around, and while I admit to suffering from boo-hoo-itus on a few occasions, I've generally made it a point to embrace and make the most of Singles' Awareness Day when it arrives.

After all, once you enter into a relationship, you may never be single again.

We as a species are adept at longing for whatever we don't have. When I was single, I wanted a girlfriend. When I had a girlfriend, I wanted to be sing—ouch—::ahem:: um...singing to her. Lovingly. Of course, dear. There are ups and downs to any situation; it's often our priorities—our own selfishness, even—that make being in or out of a relationship more desirable.

I can't help but think of Philippians 4:11-12, where Paul says, "I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me." (Translation from the New Revised Standard Version of the Bible).

Maybe you've got a romantic getaway planned for Valentine's Day. Maybe you just want to get away from Valentine's Day. While one person is at home alone, missing the feel of that Special Someone in their arms, another person is out at a restaurant with their spouse, missing their favorite TV show and the feel of a $100 bill in their wallet. It's easy enough for anybody to be miserable.

You know what I was doing for Valentine's Day about a decade ago? Playing video games and watching movies with my best guy friends. You know what I'm probably doing for Valentine's Day this year? Playing video games and watching movies with my best gal friend. (We're terribly romantic. We also had our fancy dinner out yesterday, 'cuz you apparently can't get reservations on Valentine's Day if you don't call two months in advance. But I digress.)

Valentine's Day is only as much of an obligation or lonely reminder as we make it out to be. We're only human, so it's not like we can shut off our emotions if we're feeling depressed or overwhelmed...but we don't have to wallow in them.

Holiday or not, I hope you find something to make this Thursday awesome.
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